My mental health is being impacted by my job. I’m on edge daily. When I hear the ping of an instant message I immediately become afraid. Afraid wondering who it is from and afraid wondering if I have some how fallen short again. My anxiety is at an all time high lately and I’ve been needing my as needed Xanax prescription more than ever.
I dread meetings with my manager and his chief of staff.
The chief of staff put a meeting on my calendar at 3p on Monday and I was fearful that I was being fired. Turns out she wanted to discuss my questions about the medical insurance. That meeting could have been an email.
I realize I cannot continue my life in a constant state of fear. My resume has been updated. I will start applying for something else this weekend.
DDC
Lesson: I have to get out.
Question: Will someone else hire me in project management with three months of experience or am I stuck here?
Last week was mentally exhausting. I had dreams of burning bridges, sending honest email messages telling people exactly how I felt cursing them out with a professional twist, and throwing a couple laptops off the roof of a nearby 10 story building. I decided to focus on gratitude. It is always better to focus on the positives of life.
This week I am still choosing gratitude. Grateful for the challenges I am encountering because I know there will be a blessing on the other side.
DDC
Lesson: Joy will come in God’s timing.
Question: You have a choice. Change your situation or change the way you look at it. Which do you choose?
I asked ChatGPT for a cheat sheet on how to make life easier.
Here are the tips:
1. Prioritize and organize: Identify your most important tasks and create a schedule or to-do list to stay focused and productive.
I am creating daily time blocked agendas using the Notes app.
2. Delegate and ask for help: Don’t be afraid to delegate tasks or ask for assistance when needed. Sharing responsibilities can lighten your load.
I have enjoyed using Shipt to order groceries and get them delivered on a weekly basis.
3. Simplify and declutter: Streamline your physical and digital spaces by decluttering and organizing. This can reduce stress and make it easier to find what you need.
This month I plan to organize, declutter and significantly purge my clothes. My closet is currently jam packed with items I haven’t thought about or worn that need to be given to someone who can put use to them.
4. Practice self-care: Take care of your physical, mental, and emotional well-being. Get enough sleep, eat nutritious food, exercise regularly, and make time for activities you enjoy.
Sleep is no stranger. We spend a lot of time together nightly and occasionally I will make the time for a midday nap to reset for the second half of the workday.
I met with my counselor Hope on Tuesday and will schedule biweekly calls with her.
I have become mindful of what I am eating with the goal of eating 80% paleo.
Starting Monday January 22nd I will begin a 60 day PiYo program. It’s a DVD I purchased 10+ years ago and will finally complete in 2024.
5. Set boundaries: Learn to say no to commitments that overwhelm you and establish healthy boundaries in your personal and professional life.
In an effort to save, I have decided to limit activities that cost money and begin saying, “no” to invitations from associates.
In addition, I am making a conscious effort to avoid energy sucking people, places, or things.
6. Automate and use technology: Explore tools and technology that can automate repetitive tasks or make your daily life more efficient.
I have set up a few expenses to auto debit to avoid late fees. I started using ChatGPT to create rough drafts of professional correspondence then editing them to sound like me.
7. Learn to manage stress: Incorporate stress-reducing activities into your routine, such as meditation, deep breathing exercises, or engaging in hobbies that help you relax.
My Balance membership free trial is coming to an end soon and will cost $99 to renew for year two. I will research an alternative application that costs less annually or even utilize YouTube for meditation purposes.
One hobby I will be incorporating more of is creating vision boards on a monthly basis. Visioning brings me extreme joy.
Remember, making life easier is a continuous process, and it’s important to find what works best for you based on your individual needs and circumstances.
DDC
Lesson: I am working on making 2024 the best year yet.
Question: What new habits are you implementing to make 2024 your best year yet?
Be a YouTuber. Vlog my life. My development. Daily cleaning schedule. Do all the Routines I have been watching for the last few years
Future TED Talk Prompt in 20yr
How 2024 was the start to a new life for me. I became systematic implementing all the productivity content I have consumed. I created a successful YouTube career showing the new me. It went viral. I paid off my massive student loan debt by myself. Then bought a condo in Costa Rica. Became a dual citizen. How to not waste your life. Time management tools for the formally haphazard to systematic.
Obituary
DDC died in her sleep at the age of 85. In chapter 2 of her life she began to devote her time to living a healthy lifestyle and landed her dream career and thrived in those areas until her early retirement at 60 years old. While living she was able to become debt free and retired with millions in her financial portfolio. She is survived by her loving husband and successful well rounded son and extended family. She left her grandchildren generational wealth. Her family remembers her for good vibes, reliability, a go to in a clutch, and to always tell the hard truths. DDC was an active member in worship at Westside Baptist in Lewisville, Tx and Franklin Avenue Baptist in New Orleans, La. DDC started her first 75 Soft in 2023 then proceeded to live by the principles for the rest of her life. DDC wrote her memoirs discussing her life lessons and it was a New York Times best seller. Then gave a TED talk on the lessons which was the kick start of her world tour in motivational speaking.
Relationships
• People share memories of their experiences with me.
• How I made a positive impact on their lives.
• How watching me prosper made them also want to prosper
• My grandchildren would say that I was their biggest supporter.
• My son will say I taught him money management skills and left him generational wealth
• My sister will say I was the sunshine in every room
• My husband will say I was the love of his life. He was thankful to have me. He does not know who he would be without me
• I joined my auntie Tracy, uncle Larue, and Daddy in Heaven when I died in my sleep
Work/Achievements
• In 2024, I completed a career pivot from recruiting to project management.
• It started rough but then I got my footing and thrived for years managing processes and being a leader without authority.
• I had a stable career while being a motivator for everyone around me.
• I did well in my career. My focus was more on connection with people than on business
Setting Goals for 2024
Step 1 – Dream Without Limits
Want to learn?
Project mgmt principles. 1 Spanish. 3
Emotional intelligence. 1
Want to see?
My son graduate college. 3
Want to have?
Condo in Costa Rica. 10
Paid off car. 3
Healthy body. 3
Financial independence. 3
A pet. 3
Want to be?
Project Mgr w/ six figures. 3
Fully funded 401k. 10
Want to try?
60 day PiYo program. 1
Studying for CAPM. 1
Try different trails in DFW and Gonzales/ BR. 1
Want to do?
Experience DFW like a tourist. 1 Run a marathon. 3
6 mini adventures. 1
Want to go?
Howard Homecoming. 1
Costa Rica. 3
Europe. 10
Africa. 10
Want to create?
Book of happiness lists. 3
Want to contribute?
Good vibes. 0
Choose a volunteer organization to be an active member of. 3
Help people find their joy. 1
Want to overcome?
Sensitive feelings. 3
Loneliness. 1
Step 2
10 Year
Millionaire retirement acct. 10
Condo in Costa Rica. 10
No student loan debt. 10
5 Year
Travel. 5
Learn Spanish. 5
3 Year
Visit Costa Rica. 3
Project Mgr w/ six figures. 3
Get married. 3
PMP. 3
No consumer debt. 3
Be a yogi. 3
1 Year
CAPM. 1
• Why? Healthy foundation in PM knowledge. Letters on my name.
• When? 2nd quarter.
• How? Take prep course in April. Study 2hr/ wk day in qtr 2. Schedule exam for July 1. Start with Google PM certification. Apply for Google scholarship through Black MBAs.
3 Mini Adventures in DFW. 1
• Why? Go out w/ a bang in DFW. Do the touristy stuff I have yet to do. Have no DFW regrets.
• When? Feb. Mar. Apr. The w/e of the 15th.
• How? Select 1 DFW Attractions per month. i.e. JFK Museum. Reunion Tower. Perot Museum. Six Flags. Fort Worth Stockyards.
YouTube posts weekly. 1
• Why? Posting my life will encourage me to be consistent with doing all the things. I struggle with remembering the details of life. Posting will be my virtual memories. The goals are accountability, forward movement, and memories.
• When? Will record weekly wrap ups on Sundays. Edit on Monday and Tuesday. Then post on Wednesdays.
• How? Take Ali Abdaal’s YouTube content creator course. Create a practical plan.
I went from a $4 billion company to a company who paid my first paycheck through Zelle. Real talk. I feel like Molly from HBO Insecure when she started at the Black law firm and was known for saying, “at my last firm…”
I loathe my boss. I really despise him. Just thinking about him angers me. If I were a cartoon character, I’d have red fire coming from my ears right now. My boss has a way of talking to me as if I was a complete idiot. I am already a sensitive person. Those two things don’t go together well. So I cry. I cry after our interactions every few days. I get anxiety when I receive communication from him. I finally found my entrance into the world of project management. But it came at the expense of my peace.
A few of my friends told me I should quit. Maybe I should. The truth is I have $31.72 in my checking account. As much as I would love to curse a couple people out and go out with a bang I cannot afford to quit right now.
DDC
Lesson: I do not have to like my job. But I damn sure better work like I appreciate what the job affords me. The utility company does not care about my likes.
Question: Anybody hiring for project coordinators?
‘All Things Jazmine’ now shuffling on Apple Music.
“All Things Jazmine” is my playlist where I have compiled three hours and two minutes of Jazmine Sullivan. There is a song or five for every mood and I love it when Siri starts playing exactly the vibe I intended. Jazmine Sullivan’s discography consists of a variety of R&B and soulful tracks, showcasing her powerful vocals and storytelling abilities.
“I may not have a reason to think so I know, but today I think I’m gone win the lottery.”
Jazmine Sullivan. Silver Linings. Reality Show Album.
Silver Linings sparks feelings of positivity in me. Feelings of instant hope. Immediate excitement while considering a limitless future.
Another excellent start is Dream Big. The legendary Missy Elliot starts with the kind of energy where you immediately know a banger is beginning.
“This is a Jazmine exclusive SUCKERS! Oh, we gonna take ’em to the club like this.”
Jazmine Sullivan. Dream Big. Love Me Back Album.
Jazmine will do her thing encouraging very high energy in me. A catalyst where I cannot contain my energy to sing . . . well . . yell along with her.
“Packin’ up my shh and I’m going real far. Going off to Hollywood to be a big star. There’s nothing here for me so I gotta move fast. And I’m getting on the road and won’t never look back (hey)”
Jazmine Sullivan. Dream Big. Fearless Album.
It is obvious I literally love all things Jazmine Sullivan. I love listening to her music collection more than any other artist. I frequently use her lyrics as captions on my social media posts. I can instantly identify the specific song I need to hear in the specific moment I need to hear. Her words have inspired previous blog posts. My post entitled, “Stanley,” was birthed from listening to her song of the same name.
My favorite of all time from Jazmine Sullivan and possibly of all music is Masterpiece.
Masterpiece has a way of touching my soul on a deep level.
“I’m a work of art, a Mona Lisa. I’ll share my picture with the world. Not afraid to let it show anymore”
Jazmine Sullivan. Masterpiece. Reality Show Album.
Masterpiece is an empowering song about self-acceptance and recognizing your inner beauty. The lyrics convey a message of embracing your flaws and realizing that every part of you is a work of art. This song encourages me to let go of self-doubt and all negative self-perception. It highlights the importance of believing in one’s own worth and sharing that unique beauty with the world. Overall, Masterpiece is a celebration of self-love and self-expression.
I love this song so much that for my 42nd birthday, my favorite person, my SONshine, gifted me the most thoughtful gift I have possibly ever. Wall art with song lyrics of Masterpiece in the shape of an album with the caption, “To My Amazing Mother” and the date. 11/23/23.
It has to be the most perfect, most thoughtful, most tailored to who I am gift that I could have ever imagined.
I love Jazmine Sullivan’s music more than any other artist.
I love Mason Riley more than any other person. He’s my baby. My greatest accomplishment. So thoughtful. A good human being.
DDC
Lesson: I send Mason a few links to exactly what I want for my birthday every year. I include options at different price points. I’m very hard to buy a gift for. If I want something, then I’ll treat myself to it with little to no hesitation. This year Mason wanted to get me something on his own. No link required. He declared he wanted to put thought into it like I do.
Mason Riley exceeded my expectations on every level with this one.
Question: What song resonates with you? A song that inspires you to be better? Take some time today and actively listen to it. Then comment on my Instagram @DDCandthecity telling me the feelings inspired from listening.
Note: Mason Riley is in his junior year of Howard University studying Film & Television Production. Very soon, January 26, my SONshine will be 21 years old. Time flies when you are having fun.
I exude good vibes. I literally exude good vibes. LITERALLY. When I am present in a social setting I consistently have the innate ability to positively influence the atmosphere. Every where I go. That’s good vibes.
People want to experience my good vibes. I meet people while I am out living my life like it’s golden. Very often I meet strangers and we will have a moment together. A moment is when you have a transparent interaction with someone else. I have moments where I offer an alternative positive perspective they haven’t considered which encourages that individual to feel better. Brighter. Good vibes.
My good vibes receive invitations to go to hip destinations I didn’t even know existed. That’s how I know where I can live my life like it’s golden.
For example, I met a real cool chick. We were living life like it’s golden in group social settings. We comment on each other’s social media. Good vibes. She invited me to her birthday vacation. Out of the country. This month. She wanted some good vibes on her vacation. I was so flattered. You don’t just invite random people to your birthday vacation out of the country. You invite people who produce good vibes. Me. I was honored and appreciative of the invitation. If my current financial situation was a different situation I would’ve swiftly initiated my vacation preparation. Lists. If you know me then you know I travel prepared with a list with details. I love a good list.
I had a conversation with my neighbor at the hot tub a few months ago. She mentioned that she’s intentional about who she lets experience her good vibes. Her vibe is precious.People have to earn admission. Hmm. I heard her words that night but they didn’t actually resonate with my soul until now. Months later.
I met a guy on Hinge. We had our meet and greet at Bar Louie a while back. He came to my house and we chilled one evening. I went to his place and we were coworkers one afternoon. I love an afternoon coworker. He called a few times. we’d talk for 10-15 mins every now and again. Our conversation never was that interesting. Superficial subject matters. He texted tonight asking about my new gig. His text angered me. Here comes another superficial waste of my good energy. I’m tired of being convenient. I’m no longer available for superficial conversation from people who are only focused on my good vibes when it’s convenient for them. I am no longer the chick you text when you are bored and need some good vibes in your life. I want to be someone’s priority not just some quick good vibes high when it’s convenient.
My good vibes ARE precious.
I adore my neighbor. She’s my favorite. She has a consistent 8:30pm arrival to the hot tube. With the cutest clear portable hookah. It’s not from Amazon. I asked. Our conversations are good vibes. She’s good vibes.
Dude from Hinge who barely texts doesn’t deserve to experience my good energy. Furthermore, I am going to be more particular about who I let experience my good energy just like my favorite neighbor.
Later tonight, I am hosting the debut karaoke night at Lena’s Ontechnology for a college friend. In my low mood, all I wanted to do was… well, absolutely nothing. I didn’t feel like doing a single thing. My usual spark was missing in action. How in the hell am I going to be able to put my game face on enough to host a karaoke night when I do not want to get out of bed? I woke up in a low mood. Last night, I decided that I would wake up at 7 a.m. Unfortunately, I did not tell the alarm clock. I naturally woke up after 8 a.m. to disappointment. I wanted to lay in bed longer than a sloth on a weekend. But then, thankfully, I remembered I had a phone interview for a project management position at 10 a.m. I needed to do my usual interview preparation. I needed to research the company, review the interviewer’s LinkedIn profile, and prepare some thought provoking questions.
So, I played my interview anthem to get in gear. Rick Ross blared over the HomePod loud and clear, “Everyday I’m hustlin’. Everyday I’m, everyday I’m, everyday I’m hustlin’. Everyday I’m hustlin’.” Okay. It’s go time!! I pulled up my resume, the job description, and LinkedIn and waited patiently. And you won’t believe it, the interviewer was a no call, no show to the phone interview that I was so excited about. After waiting for 15+ minutes, I realized that she wasn’t going to call. I did my due diligence and sent an email requesting a reschedule, and then at that moment, a heavy cloud came over my spirit. I wanted to get back in bed and stay there… indefinitely. So, I sent out the SOS text to my tribe (I needed encouragement) and then called my Mama and cried. I had a really good cry. My Mom reminded me that I’ve conquered this unemployment demon before and I WILL do it again. Instead of getting in the bed and deep under the covers, I made the decision to fight the low mood. Besides, I have to be fabulous tonight. I had a list of things to cross off my to-do list. Hair. Outfit. Makeup. Plus I needed to send out a few reminders about tonight’s festivities.
I stopped by Walgreens on the way home and picked up some prints of my family. My sister had the idea to get a picture of Daddy printed for her place. I picked out my favorite picture of Daddy. He had the biggest smile. The kind of smile where your eyes squint. I bought him a Michael Kors shirt for Christmas one year. His first designer article of clothing. His excitement shines through the photo. It was my Mom’s idea to keep the original price on the shirt. I never told him that I got it from Nordstrom’s Rack for half the ticketed price. I also printed a photo of my sister, Nicole, my Mom, and I from the New Orleans City Park from 2022. I’d arranged for my cousin to take our pictures as a surprise for my Mom. The third picture was of my BFF and I from my 40th birthday in 2021. I am in rare form in that picture. My BFF is looking beautiful, poised, and reserved as usual next to my gangster chic. Printing pictures is such a lost art. My stomach began to growl a bit. Walgreens is in the same parking lot as El Fenix. Chips and salsa, please! I treated myself to the chocolate caramel sopapilla and a tequila sunrise. I sent out a few reminders about tonight.
My neighbor came over, and we had girl chat while I finished putting on my makeup. She instructed me to put a gold shimmer in my tear duct. A tip that was the perfect addition to my nighttime look. We proceeded to drink a few shots of tequila. Well, she had shots, and I had coconut flavored tequila with water as my mixer. I arrived at Lena’s Ontechnology, and I saw my BFF already in the parking lot. She’s not known for being early for events. Her presence gave me a sense of calmness and familiarity that I needed tonight. I walked in, and there were already three more friends sitting on the barstools with huge smiles and comforting words. I felt so loved.
Yes! Let’s get this party started!!! 🎤🎶
Lesson: I do experience low vibrations from time to time. Job searching is emotionally draining. I need people. I’m energized by being around people.
I was deeply moved by some Instagram posts this morning. It wasn’t envy that got to me, despite seeing all the lucky people who attended the Beyoncé concert with a surprise appearance from Meg Thee Stallion in Houston this weekend.
Instead, it brought up complex emotions, making me contemplate taking a break from social media while Beyoncé was in Texas. I was apprehensive about witnessing local folks having the time of their lives while I was at home. Surprisingly, I found myself unaffected by those posts. In fact, I enjoyed seeing everyone’s concert outfits more than watching clips from the show.
What did sting, though, was discovering that my close friends were going to the concert, especially since no one had considered asking if I was remotely interested in going. I managed to bounce back from that as well.
Today, I came across two consecutive Instagram posts featuring famous daughters expressing gratitude for their fathers being there for them during emotional times in their lives. First, there was Sarah Jakes Roberts, whom I’m becoming a big fan of after listening to her podcasts. She shared a touching photo of her dad kissing her head before her Women Evolve Conference, capturing a moment of nerves.
Then, it was Tia Mowry who posted a heartfelt tribute to her father, describing him as her protector and attaching several photos of cherished moments with him. Reading her caption brought tears to my eyes.
One of the many notable lines my Daddy used to say to me was, “I’m going to dance at your wedding.” Whenever I did something that made him happy or proud, he’d say it. Since he was proud or happy about almost everything I did, he said it quite often. I have numerous fond memories associated with him and this phrase. I recall growing up on Nashville Ave, where Pepsi was my Daddy’s water when he still consumed caffeine. He’d ask me to bring him a Pepsi and would express his gratitude by offering to dance at my wedding with a huge grin.
The idea of having a wedding without my Daddy feels unimaginable. If he can’t walk me down the aisle, then I don’t want to walk down the aisle at all. So, I’ve made the decision to have a courthouse marriage. No aisles. No walks. No dancing.
XOXO
-DDC
Lesson: A wedding isn’t in my near future. Hinge has been fun. I have had a few interesting meet and greets. One official date. No marriage proposals.
Question: What is your favorite song on Beyonce’s latest album, Renaissance?
DDCANDTHECITY 