About Me, Humor, Love Life

The Speech I Should Have Given

My BFF got married this weekend at a beautiful, love-filled wedding — the kind of day that feels like a movie, where everything and everyone is glowing, and you can feel love in the air like confetti.

I told her that I wanted to be on program at her wedding. Her response? “There’s no program, but you can speak at the reception.” Somehow, I heard that as a maybe. Not exactly the guaranteed microphone moment I envisioned.

Still, I prepared — because that’s what best friends do. I spent the weeks leading up to the wedding studying YouTube speeches, jotting down notes, and even consulting ChatGPT (yes, I had AI assist with my emotions — don’t judge). I wrote a few sentences that I thought might capture our friendship — just in case the opportunity came up.

Then came the reception. The music was perfect, the love was loud, and the energy was everything. At one point, Sharecker walked over to me and said, “It’s almost time for speeches.”

And I froze. Like a deer in headlights.

She must’ve noticed because she immediately offered, “You don’t have to if you don’t want to.”

But of course I wanted to.

I reached for my phone to review the notes I’d so carefully prepared — and right then, my phone screen went black. Dead. No charger in sight.

So I did what best friends do when life doesn’t go according to plan — I spoke from the heart.

I stood up, nerves shaking, voice cracking, and said what I could remember: that I loved her deeply, that I was proud of her, and that seeing her so happy filled me with joy. There were laughs, there were tears, and it felt like the right kind of imperfect — the kind that’s real.

But now, with my 27” monitor, full battery, and all the words that escaped me that night — here’s the speech I should have given:


The Speech 

Good evening, everyone. I’m Danielle Denise Clark, and I have the honor of being best friends with the beautiful bride, Sharecker.

We met riding bikes in middle school, and from the very first moment, I knew I needed her in my life for the rest of my life.

Over the past 30 years, Sharecker has always been love in motion. With acts of service as her love language, she has shown up for me in every way imaginable — physically, emotionally, spiritually, and wholeheartedly.

We’re quite the opposites, too. I can be loud, over the top, and a little extra — while she’s calm, reserved, and effortlessly cool. But that balance has always been the heartbeat of our friendship.

Sharecker is generous with her spirit, steady in her presence, and intentional with her words. She doesn’t just talk about love — she lives it.

And today, watching her marry Charles — the man who makes her feel safe, seen, and protected — felt like witnessing love find its home.

So here’s to Sharecker and Charles:
May your marriage be filled with joy, understanding, forgiveness, and friendship.
May you continue to choose each other everyday, again and again, in both the ordinary and extraordinary moments that make up your life together.

And in the words of a great poet, Nicki Minaj:
“It’s a celebration every time we link up. Greatness is what we are on the brink of. I wish I could have this moment for life”

Cheers to the Sellers — to love, laughter, and a lifetime of togetherness. 

DDC

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Chapter 2

Reflections from August

1. Mason came to my infusion appointment for the first time.

2. Free burgers from Slutty Vegan w/ Mason. Tasty.

3. I love Oreo. I’m officially a dog Auntie.

4. My neighbor taught my BFF a cool way to squirt pool water.

5. Mason taught me how to skip.

6. My Aunties Mary, Gail, Karen and I sang karaoke and danced around the house. Titanium!

7. Bar Louie meetup w/ Ernest. Time for a hair cut.

8. Got my first tattoo, my Daddy’s birthday.

9. Experienced Rhythm and Bowl at Bowlero on Tuesday nights. Karaoke!

10. Had eggs and rice for breakfast in Louisiana. Delicious.

11. Discovered the neighborhood pool in Gonzales. Relaxation.

12. Edited the program at the daiquiri shop. Bellini.

13. Mason went back to school. Hello, empty nest:)

14. Posted a video of my Mom saying, “What’s that?”

15. My Daddy’s Memorial Service was beautiful. Closure.

16. My tribe showed up and out. Loved.

17. After Memorial karaoke with SuperRay at 24 hr karaoke bar. Fun.

18. Face to face counseling session w/ Hope. Release.

19. Coffee held me. Ahh.

20. Spent quality time with BFF. Understanding.

21. Mom gave words of affirmation several times. Love language.

22. Reconnected with Lalle Berry.

23. Gooden sent beautiful flowers.

24. Portable hookah from Amazon. Third time is the charm.

XOXO

Lesson: August had lots of highlights.

Question: Have you completed a monthly reset?

Monthly Reset Instructions:

Start by reflecting over the previous month. What were your highlights? Then set goals and intentions for the new month. What would you like to accomplish? How will you develop your mind? How are you going to challenge yourself this month?

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Chapter 2, Love Life

Farewell

I usually wake up before my 7am alarm. I rinse my mug from the night before. A birthday present from a friend. I love filling my mug from the filtered water spout of my side by side fridge. My new apartment comes with filtered water. It’s a first for me. Chapter Two. The little things mean so much to me. I put the cup in the microwave for 2 minutes then head the two to three steps to my dining table to take my meds. The microwave beeps, I add cinnamon dolce skinny syrup and three ice cubes and stir. I like stirring the ice until it melts. It has a calming effect to the moment. My soul is soothed by a cup of warm tea.

Coffee. It was a beautiful moment in time.

XOXO

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Multiple Sclerosis

Very Important Person

A letter.

To: My original handler, my confidant, my voice of reason, my BFF. I know you have your reasons. Here is mine.

MS sucks. Shorter walks don’t. I want a handicapped license. Can I?

The only advantage of having multiple sclerosis, a declared disability (that I can think of) is the ability to be VIP . . . in the parking lot. Let me use this advantage. Pretty pretty please.

I understand that I do not need it. I promise I do. I can walk. I can probably walk more and longer than I even think I can. That handicapped license is gold, platinum even! Always has been. I remember seeing others with it and immediately thinking, “man, I wish that I had one.” Now, because of this condition I can actually qualify. I want it! Real bad.

This weekend I had access to VIP while driving my dad’s car. I felt like royalty. I didn’t use it too much. In the hospital parking lot everyone is VIP.

Seriously, I want it for my apartment parking lot. I’ve always had an assigned spot. Originally, it was so that I would always have a spot. Then it was to have a closer spot. Now, it’s to always have the same spot. I struggle with my memory. I’m concerned that without an assigned spot I’ll have to park wherever is available meaning a different spot every day. Forgetting where I parked is an anxiety inducing experience. A panic attack waiting to happen.

At Target, I always park on the row matching the entrance. At Coffee’s, I park in the space all the way to the right (no one ever seems to use it). At the office, I park on the back row. Every single time. It takes longer to get to the entrance. However, I notice that if I park in a different spot, then I struggle to remember where my car is and sometimes I feel panicked by that. It’s an uncomfortable feeling. Very uncomfortable to me actually.

So yes. I can walk the distance. But what happens when I don’t know where I’m going?

XOXO

Lesson: I’d like an accommodation.

Question: What is your favorite place to park? Do you have one? Or is this another thing to add to my list of “weird” qualities?

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About Me, Chapter 2, Humor, Love Life, Mental Health

Mittens

My dating life has been filled with heartbreak and disappointment. The trails that I have endured have lead me to ask God, “what are You trying to teach me?” What am I to learn from these trials? I am obviously not getting it. Whatever IT is. There has to be a reason for this heartbreak to keep coming one after another. What is it, God? Can You make the lesson clear to me?!? I must be doing something wrong to not have experienced the love that I long for. Does this mean I need to stop trying? Should I get a cat or two and settle into being a fine ass auntie (with no niece or nephew)?

Ironically, I do want a cat. I want to have something to talk to in my empty nest. I have been wanting one for a few years now. The stigma around single women and cats is the major reason I do not have a cat. Hmmm. On some level, I care about what other people think about me. I know I am not supposed to care, but I actually do. I don’t want to meet a guy and he shame me for having a cat. I do not want to have to pay for the boarding of a cat when I travel. My parent’s would never allow the cat in their home. My mom already told me that I would have to leave my cat in the garage when I came home.

I am going to put some thought into what I will do with the cat when I travel.

XOXO

Lesson: I do not know the lesson today.

Question: What is God trying to tell me?

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Love Life

Stanley

My BFF and I were driving down 183 passing his exit. I asked if she was in a rush or not. No. We headed to Stanley’s.

Stanley

I knew Stanley for a while. I’d been to his place a few times and remembered the directions perfectly. Stanley and I had been situationshipping, but he hadn’t been responding to my calls lately. Which was extra weird considering that I was calling the phone that I gave him. Gosh, I was stupid. I am stupid. I used to be stupid. I won’t be stupid anymore.

BFF and I drove around the maze of the parking lot and parked Action Adventure* in the spot directly in front of his apartment. We were in her car. I figured he wouldn’t know the car. Smart, right?

I sat in the passenger seat of my BFF’s car and called Stanley thirty five times. In a row. Back to back. Why? To this day I have no Earthly idea what was my intention. What could dialing this man’s phone number, back to back, 35 times in a row accomplish? Did I think that these actions would end in a positive result? I couldn’t. Could I? Did I?

He answered.

I gasped. Shocked.

He said, “are you in front of my place?” I gasped, “huh?”

I’m sure you could imagine how that conversation went. What the hell was I thinking? What was the point? Why? Just why?!?!?! This has been 10+ years ago and I still do not know the answer.

Fast forward. I had a Black male colleague on my team for the first time in a long time and we became friends. One day we were talking about our friends and some way some how I figured out that my colleague’s best friend since youth was Stanley. You have got to be kidding me!?! Nope. Best friends! I confessed to my 35 calls from the parking lot to my colleague. We laughed. We moved on.

My team from work went to The Hideaway for happy hour on pay day and guess who wanted to come? Yep. Stanley. By this time I had told the whole team about 35. I should probably be ashamed, but it is too funny for me to hide. So when Stanley walks up everyone had a good laugh at my story again.

Stanley and I reconnected. Laughed about 35. Exchanged information and have been in touch again. For a few years. We connect every now and then. Have a few laughs and then go our separate ways.

We laughed recently. It was fun. I wondered if I’d been missing out by not taking him seriously. Could I actually be with Stanley after all of this time?

Fuck no! Stanley is still Stanleying and I do not have the energy for his level of foolishness.

We can laugh. But I’ll never cry for him again.

XOXO

Lesson: Once ‘ain’t no good’. Always ‘ain’t no good.’

Question: Why do I still entertain Stanley knowing that he ‘ain’t no good?’

*Action Adventure is when you back into a parking spot just in case you have to leave expeditiously.

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About Me

Introducing DDCANDTHECITY!!!

I am Danielle. Danielle Denise Clark. Brown Sugar. DDC. DDCANDTHECITY. A play off Sex and the City. I am DDC and I have adventures in the city.

Note: these are the only names that will answer to. No Dani. No Denise. No D. It actually makes my blood boil to be called D.

Welcome to my world. Come in, get settled, and buckle up for the ride.

I initially created this blog, at the request of my life long BFF, to write about my dating chronicles in detail anonymously. I have had some entertaining experiences. Ask me about Master P.

However, I realize that I am more than my love life. I’m a mother. A daughter. A sister and a friend. A blogger. I love karaoke, afternoon naps, and repeatedly watching the same two tv shows on Netflix. Grace and Frankie and Schitt$ Creek. Self love, personal finance, health and wellness and my birthday celebrations are some of my favorite topics. I am sure there are a few more things that I could add to my about me, but this is just a start.

This blog is to be an outlet for me to share my experiences. A place to house my thoughts and express myself. Would I like it to grow and get monetized? Absolutely. But it isn’t the goal. The goal is to have a place to go to remember adventures at times when my memory fails me.

XOXO

Lesson:

1. Don’t call me D.

2. Watch Grace and Frankie and Schitt$ Creek.

Question:

What do you write in your “about me?”

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